


he'll be safe, he'll come home

by theseawillneversettle



Series: and it's my turn to settle down [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Insecure Phil, M/M, all around pheels tbh, is that a thing?, relationship introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-17
Updated: 2013-03-17
Packaged: 2017-12-05 15:45:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/725005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theseawillneversettle/pseuds/theseawillneversettle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint's away. Phil's insecurities echo in their empty home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	he'll be safe, he'll come home

**Author's Note:**

> So this is what happens at 3am after consuming caffeine late at night; did a quick read through, am now posting it and wiping my hands of it.

He'll be safe. He'll come home.

Pacing in their small living room, worrying about his husband, was not the way Phil anticipated spending his Sunday evening. It's past two in the morning and Clint is still incommunicado; a routine recon with Natasha either went wrong or Phil's greatest fear of both assets gone rogue has turned into reality. He knew the bond both Natasha and Clint shared went past love into something deeper... perhaps primal. Knew what he had with Clint was the same yet completely different. Clint implicitly trusts and loves Phil, but his loyalty to Natasha has so far held strong; if she goes Clint would quickly follow.

The rational side of Phil’s mind knows neither Clint nor Natasha would keep him in the dark for long. The bond they share has somehow grown to include him; would at least say goodbye, tell him they're safe. He also knows Clint would never leave him.... not for long, not without explaining himself even if the excuse was meager. Knows they would never exclude him from anything important that there's a reason he's their medical proxy and next-of-kin; knows beyond a doubt that their loyalty to SHIELD will always be bound to him. Yet knowing is different from believing and without Clint's assuring presence, Phil's fears come and rear their ugly head and make themselves known.

The other worries whether one more undercover op could rekindle the old flame that nearly ended whatever Clint and Phil were building towards. Would years of a commitment end to revisit those two months a decade ago? Two months of a silent Clint while on an unsanctioned recruitment of the Black Widow. Two months of traipsing across Eastern Europe, dingy room after dingy room, to come back bloodied and dirtied with Clint vouching for the Widow. Never leaving her sight and sleeping against the wall across her holding cell or talking through a metal door in broken Russian. Thanking Phil for the support while something in Phil breaks; hiding in meetings and the office, locking the door for unexpected archers, avoiding eye contact and ignoring the small smiles and even smaller touches between Natasha and Clint. .

But no, 5 months after their return to SHIELD, whatever Phil and Clint were building towards solidified in dinners in Phil's office, channel surfing in rec rooms, coffee at odd hours, in-jokes and small touches. Small talk turning into impromptu cooking lessons and dinners at Phil's apartment, a light kiss over burning pasta, declarations whispered in the dark. Natasha slipping into a godmother of sorts; planning dates, making sure they're kept and properly dressed for. 

Phil's phone rings and it’s Hill. They've checked in, have some new information on old enemies and en route to the rendezvous point 12 days behind schedule. Snapped out of his reverie, Phil can now breathe easier. They're safe, mission accomplished, a few debriefs and Clint will be home chucking off shoes in the hallway and stripping away whatever armor needed for the op, be it a suit or SHIELD's field tact suit, letting it lie in a neglected pile till the next day. Once they're done memorizing new scars and revisiting old scars.

He's safe and on his way back.


End file.
